Maryann Hartzell-Curran

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My Sole Mate

August 29, 2024 By Maryann Curran Leave a Comment

Many people believe that at some time in their lives they meet their soul mate. I firmly believe that old adage based on my own personal experiences over a lifetime of seventy years. I had my “soul mate” episode with my little Maltese-Yorky, Herschell.

Herschell-young_dog-and_meHerschell came into my life a year after my husband, John, passed away in 1998. From the first moment that he rested on my lap until his heart stopped beating in 2012 we were inseparable! We had a special friendship and shared many adventures. I always felt that when he looked me in the eyes we were connected by a special bond. Now, that he is no longer with me, I have learned to appreciate the gift he gave to me even more.

Herschell was also my “sole mate.” We shared millions of miles walking together over the years. He was always good on his many leashes. I had the expandable ones, the short ones and then finally settled on a six-foot version upon moving to Florida. It gave me more control over this feisty, happy, little dog. Until the last year of his life, Herschell loved to run . . . run away is a better description! There were many heart-stopping moments when I was searching for him after he disappeared. Sometimes I had no idea of where he went but we always re-connected eventually.

One time, as a puppy, he ran out of my little backyard which was adjacent to a very busy highway. While calling his name, asking neighbors to help and running frantically about, he appeared, emerging from a large culvert in the subdivision. I remember throwing myself on the ground, hugging him, getting full of grass stains and crying for joy. He actually looked like he too was glad to be found and that he had a good home to return to. Funny, after all these years, that particular reunion stays forefront in my mind.

Our walking journeys covered not only miles but terrain. We walked through woods, over bridges, jumped puddles, on gravel and concrete roads. His little feet kept up with mine, going twice as fast. After all, his legs were shorter and he was closer to the ground. Too bad I didn’t keep track of all those walks. I bet we covered half of the world in distance during the twelve years we were together.

On our walks we met many dogs and many people. Anyone who walks a dog knows this is true and also that we “dog people” are genuinely happy souls. That was how I always felt when I walked my “sole mate.” In Florida his little feet got hot and toughened by the asphalt roads in our community. I wish that I had invented little sandals for his paws, thus preventing this abuse. But Herschell, being Herschell, would have found them to be toys — not protection. I smile thinking about this!

I am writing this in celebration of his life . . . specifically on this, the third anniversary of his passing. I have his leashes in my Herschell box that I will take out on June 2. Many scarves from groomers, leashes and collars are part of its contents. Even the set we bought in Paris many years ago. I will touch them with tears rolling down my cheeks. Then the box will go back on a high shelf for next year’s visit. So I believe that “soul mates” come in different forms. Mine was a little dog named “Herschell” who truly knew my soul and I his. I was blessed with his friendship and devotion and I miss him.

My wish for all of you is that you have a soul mate or perhaps a sole mate like Herschell.

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Reader Reviews

This is a journey of courage; one that we will all travel someday.

"I have known Mary for almost 25 years and have read many of her manuscripts. From We to Me is by far the most beautiful of her works. She painstakingly shares her memories of the first 365 days of her life as a widow, including moving events most of us would be too embarrassed to reveal.  I recommend this to not only those who have lost a loved one, but to anyone who is afraid to feel.  This is a journey of courage; one that we will all travel someday.”

~ Dr. Lynn Deegan, Psy. D.

Maryann Hartzell-Curran
2019-05-01T11:46:04-04:00

~ Dr. Lynn Deegan, Psy. D.

"I have known Mary for almost 25 years and have read many of her manuscripts. From We to Me is by far the most beautiful of her works. She painstakingly shares her memories of the first 365 days of her life as a widow, including moving events most of us would be too embarrassed to reveal.  I recommend this to not only those who have lost a loved one, but to anyone who is afraid to feel.  This is a journey of courage; one that we will all travel someday.”
https://maryanncurran.com/testimonials/1249/

Thank you again for your beautiful gift.

“I’ve read 38 letters…I am taking my time and reading few each night enjoying each letter. I always find something that I can relate to in losing my parents and even my cat, KitKat.  Yesterday was 11 months since Dad had died and I found myself getting out of bed last night and going into his room to talk to him. I love the story of JT and Kelly walking in your footprints…how wonderful. Thank you again for your beautiful gift.”

~ Nanette

Maryann Hartzell-Curran
2019-05-01T11:46:35-04:00

~ Nanette

“I’ve read 38 letters…I am taking my time and reading few each night enjoying each letter. I always find something that I can relate to in losing my parents and even my cat, KitKat.  Yesterday was 11 months since Dad had died and I found myself getting out of bed last night and going into his room to talk to him. I love the story of JT and Kelly walking in your footprints…how wonderful. Thank you again for your beautiful gift.”
https://maryanncurran.com/testimonials/1250/

She is honest and that is what most of us need…

"What makes FROM WE TO ME different than other books on grief is the openness of the author and her honesty with her feelings. Not kid gloves but boxing gloves are a good way to illustrate how she treats the elements of her loss e.g. anger, fear and regret. She is honest and that is what most of us need when a loss inflicts pain on our “perfect” worlds. Thank you Maryann.”

~ Neal

Maryann Hartzell-Curran
2019-05-01T11:47:04-04:00

~ Neal

"What makes FROM WE TO ME different than other books on grief is the openness of the author and her honesty with her feelings. Not kid gloves but boxing gloves are a good way to illustrate how she treats the elements of her loss e.g. anger, fear and regret. She is honest and that is what most of us need when a loss inflicts pain on our “perfect” worlds. Thank you Maryann.”
https://maryanncurran.com/testimonials/1251/

Her words spoke to me, reassuring me…

“I loved Maryann’s first book for many reasons -- the main one that when I read it, my husband of 55 years had just died. Her words spoke to me reassuring me that my feelings were a lot like hers and my day to day walk alone was comforted by God’s love. I can’t wait to read the new book because I have started dating and have lots of questions. I know she will cover that in her new book, FROM ME TO WE.”

~ Patricia B.

Maryann Hartzell-Curran
2019-05-01T11:48:26-04:00

~ Patricia B.

“I loved Maryann’s first book for many reasons -- the main one that when I read it, my husband of 55 years had just died. Her words spoke to me reassuring me that my feelings were a lot like hers and my day to day walk alone was comforted by God’s love. I can’t wait to read the new book because I have started dating and have lots of questions. I know she will cover that in her new book, FROM ME TO WE.”
https://maryanncurran.com/testimonials/1253/
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Maryann Hartzell-Curran

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Thank you to all my followers and greetings to my new ones. Many of you were introduced to my work after reading my first book, FROM WE TO ME…letters to my friend. This was published in the fall of 2013 and has enjoyed some success. Many of those who have read the book have written encouraging comments, saying it was helpful to those who are experiencing grief.

And now…. I’m introducing my second book, From Me to We. Lots of people have asked me why I wrote it, and it’s because I wanted to share my years after the first year, detailed in From We to Me, with readers. I always emphasize that my experiences are just that… mine… and hopefully they will open people’s eyes inviting them to have similar ones. I keep my sense of humor throughout the book but also emphasize how difficult a lot of days were without my husband. Written in three parts, Section One, is how I grew up,  after the death of my husband, Section Two, the beginning of my socializing again, Section Three… taking a chance, falling in love and marrying again.  The stories are candid and the information honest and straightforward.  I’m hoping the book will help lots of people.

I continue to write my Overcoming Grief Blog and have written many stories on my Facebook page. Reading your responses has touched me deeply and given me a nudge to keep on writing. I invite you to spend some time exploring the resources and ideas within my website:

– If you’re looking for a gift for someone who has recently lost their spouse, my first book From We to Me is an ideal way to offer comfort.

– Feeling down and need some inspiration? Read some of my short stories based on experiences with my grief groups as well as personal experience in the Overcoming Grief blog section.

– Did you know I lead grief groups? I am a professional who speaks from the heart. Whether you are looking to start a grief group series or you want her to speak at your next event, contact us. I can bring wisdom and humor to those who need it most.

– If you enjoy sharing tidbits about your childhood with your grandchildren, you may enjoy some of my memoirs posted in Letters to my Granddaughter. I know a lot of you will relate to these letters, and I invite you to write your own.

SO…Welcome to you all. Thank you for all of your support over the years as I made my transition FROM WE TO ME and then FROM ME TO WE.

Listen to Maryann on The Author’s Show Podcast

What people are saying about "From Me to We"

This is a journey of courage; one that we will all travel someday.

"I have known Mary for almost 25 years and have read many of her manuscripts. From We to Me is...

~ Dr. Lynn Deegan, Psy. D.

Maryann Hartzell-Curran
2019-05-01T11:46:04-04:00

~ Dr. Lynn Deegan, Psy. D.

"I have known Mary for almost 25 years and have read many of her manuscripts. From We to Me is by far the most beautiful of her works. She painstakingly shares her memories of the first 365 days of her life as a widow, including moving events most of us would be too embarrassed to reveal.  I recommend this to not only those who have lost a loved one, but to anyone who is afraid to feel.  This is a journey of courage; one that we will all travel someday.”
https://maryanncurran.com/testimonials/1249/

Thank you again for your beautiful gift.

“I’ve read 38 letters…I am taking my time and reading few each night enjoying each letter. I always find something...

~ Nanette

Maryann Hartzell-Curran
2019-05-01T11:46:35-04:00

~ Nanette

“I’ve read 38 letters…I am taking my time and reading few each night enjoying each letter. I always find something that I can relate to in losing my parents and even my cat, KitKat.  Yesterday was 11 months since Dad had died and I found myself getting out of bed last night and going into his room to talk to him. I love the story of JT and Kelly walking in your footprints…how wonderful. Thank you again for your beautiful gift.”
https://maryanncurran.com/testimonials/1250/

She is honest and that is what most of us need…

"What makes FROM WE TO ME different than other books on grief is the openness of the author and her...

~ Neal

Maryann Hartzell-Curran
2019-05-01T11:47:04-04:00

~ Neal

"What makes FROM WE TO ME different than other books on grief is the openness of the author and her honesty with her feelings. Not kid gloves but boxing gloves are a good way to illustrate how she treats the elements of her loss e.g. anger, fear and regret. She is honest and that is what most of us need when a loss inflicts pain on our “perfect” worlds. Thank you Maryann.”
https://maryanncurran.com/testimonials/1251/

Her words spoke to me, reassuring me…

“I loved Maryann’s first book for many reasons -- the main one that when I read it, my husband of...

~ Patricia B.

Maryann Hartzell-Curran
2019-05-01T11:48:26-04:00

~ Patricia B.

“I loved Maryann’s first book for many reasons -- the main one that when I read it, my husband of 55 years had just died. Her words spoke to me reassuring me that my feelings were a lot like hers and my day to day walk alone was comforted by God’s love. I can’t wait to read the new book because I have started dating and have lots of questions. I know she will cover that in her new book, FROM ME TO WE.”
https://maryanncurran.com/testimonials/1253/
0
0
Maryann Hartzell-Curran

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